Has 2013 been a fabulous, rewarding, special year or a difficult, challenging, confronting year for you?
I don’t actually ever remember a year having been so talked about as much as 2013. Is it just me, or have you noticed too, there have already been countless comments in passing summing the year up, what has happened, just how challenging a year it has been – and it hasn’t even finished yet. From a world economic environment being anything but secure, to an general underlying feeling of unfulfilment within the work place, to the weather being the hottest or the wildest or the extremist in recent history, 2013 has brought its fair share of challenges.
On a personal level 2013 has been an ‘interesting year’ to say the least (I say this through gritted teeth). I am not sure I would call it the worst year but it certainly has not been the best. As we seem to be on the homerun, with 31 Dec being only 46 sleeps away, I thought I would take the opportunity to examine what 2013 has meant to me, perhaps it has meant similar to you…
To sum it up it has been a year of ‘forcing growth from adversity’…
The November horoscopes in the STA magazine reinforced the point: ‘if you understand adversity is a gift then you will fare well this month.’
I would have extend that to ‘this year’.
But in experiencing adversity for the most part of this year, I see now the gifts that it has brought me. Dealing with situations that have left me raw and lacking faith, have shown me my edges. From people who have pushed my buttons I have seen the weak spots in my character. From difficult situations I have asked and answered the questions of myself, the – why am I so affected, the – why am I behaving this way, exposing my true character. From every testing and challenging situation I have learned oh so much.
From unfulfilled desires I have learned patience.
From bouts of jealousy I have learned there is enough to go around, like a cloud of experiences above the earth we draw what is rightfully ours, while others draw what is rightfully theirs.
From bouts of anxiety I have learned to calm my mind.
From lack of acknowledgement I have learned that I am my most important audience.
From times of loneliness I have learned to connect with society.
From having to do things on my own I have learned I can take as much or as little from the experience as I wish and this knows no boundaries like those from a closed but well intention companion.
From showing my vulnerable side I have been shown just how compassionate people can be.
From the times I have expressed ‘poor me’ I have learned from others the power of making decisions or taking action to change something that is not working. And I have also learned that not taking action is a sign that there are blockages to work through.
From asking I have learned how willing others are to give.
From reacting to critics I have seen my own fragility, a sign to firm up my own self belief.
I have learned that courage is about forging your own path, believing in yourself even when others try to lead you a different way.
From lack of support I have had to grow all on my own, to cement in my own mind what it is that I stand for, that I believe in, without influence.
From ongoing power struggles I have learned to negotiate with love, first and foremost with a love for myself.
From financial insecurity I have learned to stop worrying about the future but to do things today which may aid my security for the future.
From desperately wanting to know the future I have learned to live in the present. A necessary end to a constant search for answers has lead me to live for now and to follow my instincts.
From open and closed doors I have learned to follow my intuition.
From failure I have learned to let go of expectation.
From facing my fears I have learned that the pride that follows the achievement from facing fear far outweighs the fear itself.
I have learned that to be a leader is to walk a lonely path.
From despair I have learned how important it is to have faith.
I have learned to see colours so that as I type this, my computer is surrounded by green blotches, the colour of healing.
From working with energy I have learned that everything is about the flow of energy.
I have learned that to live through my heart is the answer to keeping the energy flow in balance ensuring I neither desire it from others nor give it away unconsciously.
And most importantly I have learned that life is about practice, while all this learning should improve the way I handle myself and the situations I face, it takes practice to change old habits.
So finally, while I would not want to relive 2013, neither would I want to change any bit of it. I hope with all my heart that 2014 is much, much easier, but I am sincerely grateful to 2013 for I have grown. I have grown from a vine into a tree xx